A grandmother’s wise words

A grandmother’s wise words

Photobucket
Said a granny to her grand-daughter
Who has just turned sixteen,
Child, this is a story I do not usually share,
So listen well, and listen with care.

Many years ago, I fell in love
With a lonely lost sad soul
Who took away so much from me
That nothing still fills the hole.

It gets covered well
When I laugh for a while, I forget
But it comes back to haunt
The agony, the memories, the regret.

Sad souls are like that
They take, never give and then leave,
They devour, they consume and gobble
And once eaten ,never can you retrieve

What hurts most
Is that the love still remains
It gnaws you silently like a termite
Leaving you empty,broken and in chains

So stay away from the vampirish sad souls
Let them find someone else to eat
Cover your heart, protect it, nourish it
And you’ll know when to give love and when to retreat.

© Preeti Shenoy
_____________________________________________________
Kindly do not reproduce without permission

Wordless Wednesday No.8

November 16, 2008

Happy Birthday Niall

November 16, 2008

82 Thoughts on A grandmother’s wise words

  1. this is the first time i am visiting your blog. Nice usage of words in the poem and a new way to put the theme of love forward. The theme is not new but you have done a good job in creating a new angle for it.
    That photo taken by your son in the first post as of now is really good.

  2. i loved it! you said it all without sounding even the C of cliche`d and E of exaggerated.

    🙂

  3. Hmmm….makes sense now. And German granny adds the right touch. Somehow I cant imagine an Indian granny telling her grand daughter this;-o.
    Anyways…..
    I liked the simple way u put across this poem very much:-))

    p.s: But ofcourse Mother would have given it a…..:-D

  4. woww written well…..the grandmother shares her thoughts with her granddaughter….a lesson for her to learn …..really great hats off 🙂

    am new to ur blog …..it was a good read

  5. Vinni:This is a real granny. See my comment to Reflections above.

    Annie:True!

  6. If the girl herself listen granny carefully and act accordingly , she can prevent the gnawing termites entering her life. Old is Gold itself and can never be a covering to any duplicate.

  7. If the girl herself listen granny carefully and act accordingly , she can prevent the gnawing termites entering her life. Old is Gold itself and can never be a covering to any duplicate.

  8. If the girl herself listen granny carefully and act accordingly , she can prevent the gnawing termites entering her life. Old is Gold itself and can never be a covering to any duplicate.

  9. ur granny said that? i feel every girl knows this by heart by the time they are even born! thats why souls like me are always single! LOL! nice poem. u wrote it didn’t you, and blamed it on your granny.

  10. Nups:Thank you! I wish you had enabled access to your blog!Right now when i try to access your blog from your comment, it says “Blogger profile not available”. i usually reply to each and ever comment, unless its an oversight.Good luck with your blog!

    Manisha:Thank you so much!

    Prakhar:Just because the love remains it does not make YOU a vampire–a vampire is one who drains the other person of all emotions and then abandons that person.

    Rishi:How do you know?;-)

    Reflections:No offence taken at all! My friend is half German.Her mom is German and her dad is India.On her mom’s side she has a very interesting granny who shares a lot.

    Wannabewriter:See my comment above to nancy.

  11. hello
    first of all i would like to thank you for introducing me to the world of blog.. i never knew wat its all abt.. till i read abt ur book release in TOI pune and then i checked out ur blog for the first time ever i gotto knw wat blog is and then i bought ur book .. and needless to say both arw amazing 🙂
    hope u reply would mean a lot to a new blogger 😉
    take care and btb the granny as alws is right!

  12. Preeti..U have no idea how much I could connect to this poem..I so wish I had heard it when I was younger… But now I atleast know that its a phenomenon known 🙂

    thanks..I love ur posts

  13. **What hurts most
    Is that the love still remains**

    …if this is true ..then is the other person ALWAYS a “vampirish sad soul”…

    i fear someday I too wl be referred as vampire.. 🙁

  14. Right advice to a girl stepping into her adulthood .. ! 🙂

  15. ok Preethi, I just read what Wannabe wrote & I guess I cant fight my war against a 'real' granny:-(.
    But I stand by what I wrote….ur poem would have had greater impact if u had put Mother instead of Granny.
    But then again, if u take offence at my statements, re-read my 1st comment where I mention something about "non poetic duffers";-P

  16. Hey Nance…check PS’s response to my comment…she says this is a real granny…not an imaginary one…so why do you want to change it???

  17. “Ofcourse if u put it this question up in ur Blog itself, there is nothing like it. So what do u think????” asks Nancy hopefully.

  18. Reflections: LOL!! U tell me!

  19. Samosas: Exactly the same thing that motivates millions of people to share their writing through their blog posts!

    Mama-mia:Best to stay away from emotional vampires.

  20. Now that I have convinced u to CONSIDER the Mother substitution in your poem, I have landed back on earth with a bump & realised I have no clue about how to go abt the signature campaign.

    ummm any ideas??????
    😀

  21. What motivated you to share this I wonder?

  22. 🙂

    sensible advice yet again PS!

    sad souls are like overtly possesive ones! never healthy for one own soul!

    cheers!

    abha

  23. Reflections: “May the fight begin” Drum rolls–Bugle sounds–trumpets!!! :-)And i must tell you some are closer to their grannies than their moms :-)It all depends on what your equation with that person is.

  24. “We kind of sideline them and relegate them to ‘some old lady who likes to talk’. They might have a lot of wisdom to share, but no one pays any attention.”

    EXACTLY…..exactly the reason why I said granny didnt have the same effect as mother. Coz if a mother shares her pain with the daughter it will have more effect on the daughter…..for one her words will have more value….secondly the generation GAP is lesser(ofcourse omit the list of children who never listen)…..and if we follow this line of thought, there are various other reasonings in Mothers support.

    p.s – please do understand I do not disregard ur points. Ur points on its own makes total sense but on the whole makes less impact than MOTHER.
    But ofcourse I’ll fight for my rights as ur commentor to get MOTHER ‘in’ the poem:-D

  25. Reflections: 🙂 No i am not mad at you at all!In fact, honoured that you took time to think about it.Personally I felt granny and not mother for two reasons
    1.See–granny has lived longer–so she is still not able to get over the pain even after all these years.So imagine how deep it is and what a void it is that someone so old still hurts.
    2.We never think of grannies as ‘women who have had a full life’.We kind of sideline them and relegate them to ‘some old lady who likes to talk’. They might have a lot of wisdom to share, but no one pays any attention.

    Having said that if you really get 100 requests to change it–well–maybe I will!! But surely I’ll put my case forth first 🙂

  26. ummm I was wondering why granny????….I mean, why have u used granny, why not mother??? It cd have been more effective(not that it is not effective now but just feel not effective as mother)…..So…just in case if I can get 100 signatures from all ur readers for Mother, will u change it???????

    p.s – yes, yes I know it is ur thought, ur poem, ur blog page…..but just THINK, putting mother in place of granny may take the poem to another level altogether

    p.p.s – the word granny always reminds me of Red Riding Hood’s granny(the wolf);-P

    p.p.p.s – r u mad at me:-o??????

  27. Sushobhan: “A rose by any other…..”

    Nandy:Sadly they don’t.

    Sunny Raju:True.No perfect world.

    Chirpy Paro:How i wish u were a publisher 🙂

  28. nice poem… i think heartaches are a part and parcel of life. An experience in itself that gives you the message that life doesn’t have fairytale endings. In fact it teaches you to value patience. Moreover, I guess it’s a poem staright from the heart.On One post I referred you as a girl but this time GRANNY would be more appropriate.

  29. lovely !! but no1 realy does listen to granny b4 its too late, no ?? :'(

  30. hmm ya ur right, we need to learn from history, but human tendency is to experiment.

  31. So Preeti…I think your next book will be.,..Poet Priti’s beautiful poem’s collection!!!

  32. So Preeti…I think your next book will be.,..Poet Priti’s beautiful poem’s collection!!!

  33. Pooja: Sad as in emotional vampires who suck the life out of you.Definitely not good.See what Sue and Suma said.They have explained it so well.

    Myoni: Thanks!!See my reply to Puja above.

  34. what do u mean by sad souls? meaning they r never happy? but they also need someone right? only then they ll feel happy n loved, i think u cant leave them aloof, the world will be lonely. or do you mean sad as in not good?

  35. Hi PS !
    Simple and Fantastic Poem 😉
    Is there any other hidden meaning in
    “a lonely lost sad soul” .?!?!?

    Myoni

  36. Suma: Thank you–and yeah–poor granny.

    Tys: You gave me lots to think about 🙂

    Sunny raju: those who do not learn from History are condemned to repeat it.

    Joy” sensible magic I guess!

    Phoenix: U callin’ me names, Kid?!;-) and jokes apart–Thanks!

  37. That was sensible advice by the granny…sadly this knowledge sometimes comes from experience, because it is difficult when young to differentiate between the true sad soul and the soul eating one…

    but i feel for the granny..to give and give and realise that its never enough…:(

    well written…preeti

  38. :)..

    i guess its a lost cause when we enter any relation with an intent to mould the other to our expectation…granny is rite abt the emotional vampires, that drain your energy thru their melancholy…but all emotions on high has a tendency to drain…passionate , obssessive loving soul, angry soul, jealous soul, the political soul…even an overtly outwardly happy soul…

  39. hey very good one
    life is a full circle
    Not only grannies, our parents, friends, seniors telling us how they could have handled a particular thing, which they miss a lot. and advising what not to do.. but the same cycle continues..

  40. Nice poem conveying a true fact of life. Happines is just state of mind. But getting to love the right person is magical or maybe sensible. Not sure.

  41. Nice poem conveying a true fact of life. Happines is just state of mind. But getting to love the right person is magical or maybe sensible. Not sure.

  42. you're surely a smart %$^%&^% whtever:)kudos once more 😀

  43. phoenix:thanks! 🙂 As regards your question, someone once said “The secret of being a bore is to answer everything.” So as long as it conveys what in intended to, I’m happy 🙂

    Niall:True–heart has its ways.

    Wannabe writer: In India, it’s rare for grannies or moms to share–and this granny is real 🙂

  44. You wrote this thing up randomly or experienced it?? it’s not quite possible to express exact feeling along wid consequences and solution without undergoing it. its surely a preventive poem – good or bad – i dunno. but you ve surely extract all the elements of ‘that’ phase appropriately. kudos 🙂

  45. Phew!…Sadly we only learn by the mistakes we make…and perhaps this is one mistake we can never avoid!?

  46. Nice poem…very interesting… I wish real grannies..or even Moms shared their experience in love with their children or grandchildren early… mostly it happens (if ever it does) only after the child has gone through the heartbreak, I guess 🙂

    Can’t talk about the contents because I haven’t had the experience or come across such sad souls…

  47. Preeti:Thanks so much!

    xh: oh yes–grandma knows what she is talking about!;-)

  48. vow! you conveyed the thought so pristinely.. superb

  49. yeah! some people just want to stay sad and they way they are.. and makes those associate with them the same way – it is better to stay away from those sad souls.. a very wise grandma indeed 🙂

  50. Reflections:What a fabulous compliment!Thank you!!

  51. Pai:Thank you!

    Varun: I agree. not everybody is a vampire though. Those who are are best avoided.And–thanks! 🙂

  52. Tessie:Thank you 🙂

    Sunder: Ye–so true!Younger the better.Especially these days!People who do not have children will definitely not understand 🙂

    Harish:women like to nurture too–he granny has a void in her heart that still hurts.So It is natural for her to advise the grand daughter too 🙂

    Aathira:yes–sometimes you just cannot change a snake into something else 🙂

    Stillness speaks:Thanks–and very rightly said!

    Still thinking:I don’t think Grandma understands it either.Strange are the ways of the heart!

    Sango:Every person i think!

  53. Its excellent Preethi!!! It is very easy to use big fundoo words while writing a poem but the beauty of it is that u have put it in simple language which even non poetic duffers like me have no problems relating to:-)

  54. beautiful!!! 🙂

  55. Sixteen? dont you think it is too late…May be Twelve should be ok…

    The conversation my daughter had with her mother ( 2 yrs back ) when she was 5.. amma, i like kevin s cousin who has come from dubai…how can i marry him , he is in dubai? can we marry christians?

  56. why stay away from them? when the reason you fell in love is maybe because of the sadness in them…

    Its intrinsic to human race, women have nurturing instincts and no man can resist being a knight in shining armor…

  57. I am just learning to accept, and love than try to change.

    I agree that there have been cases where I saw that its just a lost case, you can’t accept nor love and all you want to do is CHANGE them!

  58. It is so ironical that the "lost sad unhappy souls" are so easy to fall in love with. What I guess inevitably gets in the way is the nurturer instinct in every woman. She thinks that she would be able to make a difference and is just the one the soul was missing all along even though logic defies this kind of thinking. Call it the onslaught of the heavy duty mush and emotion thrust upon us by the movies or just hopeless optimism.
    What's even worse is getting over all of it, like you so rightly put it, it leaves a big void which no one call fill.
    Hmm…some R&D needs to be done to fix the people who've had an encounter (of the third kind 😉 )with such souls.
    Great write again 🙂

  59. That was a bit painful.

    ‘Cover your heart, protect it, nourish it
    And you’ll know when to give love and when to retreat.’ – How Preeti? To be honest I really did not u’stand these lines, is it really east to know when to give love and when to retreat? But I also don’t wanna argue with Grandma.

  60. Beautifully written.. Hope every teenager follows the wise words.. Would help stop so many heartbreaks!

  61. Thats a luvly poem u’ve written P. so much said n such deep meaning. Superb!!

  62. It reminds me of the drains from your ‘Radiators and Drains’ 🙂

    The sad souls somehow know how to ruin our happy days. Falling in love with such a person is like drinking slow poison.

    Lovely poem!

  63. Santasizing:Thank you!!

    rm:Granny sure knows a lot 🙂

    Swathy:Though the grandma advised her teen, i do think it sis apt for all of us.After all, we don’t fall in love only during our teen–cupid can indeed strike anytime you know!

    Pranay:Which one?Sad soul(cant be!) or the one who falls in love with them?(possible)

    Cris:well what the sad souls do is not a nice thing to do–isnt it? Taking and leaving you empty without giving anything in return? and trust me–its better to be single than to be with a negative person.

    Goofy Mumma:Thanks!

    Siddharth:Thank you!

    Prats fom pune:Thanks!!

    Sue: yes–poor grandma.

  64. Meira: Yes–but the heart has its ways.sadly.

    Prats: Thank you.Some people don’t want to be happy.No matter what you do they will find hundred reasons why it isn’t right or good enough.

    Roshan:I think 16 is just right! And granny has lived long enough–so she knows what she is talking about.At her age if she cannot get over a sad soul, where will we be able to?! Sad soul here would be a negative person who never wants to be happy–if 8 things are going right, he/she will focus on the 2 that are not!Guess you know what i mean.

    Pavi: You don’t have to agree with everything I say! Granny has lived long enough and has seen life more than that 16 year old. true she should judge for herself–but once you become a mom or a granny your instinct is to protect. Oh–youll understand when u have a baby. i never understood too 🙂

    Other shru: See my reply to Roshan and Sue–and see what both of them have said.I agree with you–and with them both too.

  65. lovely poem:)
    and u said it so well with so little words:)
    im a bigger fan of urs than u can imagine:)
    way to go:)

  66. hmmm..beautiful poem. so much advice in so little words.

  67. You’re SO right.I wish we would take Granny’s advice and save ourselves the pain and regret!

  68. Thats a lovely poem you’ve written.
    And yes, agree completely with the lost cause situation. One tends to get pulle dby these sad forces, and then it’ll be too late for them to have regrets. So they start trying to make corrections…but this whole process leaves them torn and chewed up…

  69. sigh… if only that granny had TOLD ME this story a couple of years back, could have saved myself some heartache.
    But it’s true really… even for guys, its the same. We too are left with the scars of ‘sad souls’ which leave a void in our hearts.
    Interesting arguments in the comments section above me.. I personally don’t think 16 years is too young ‘to be warned’ as Pavi says though she’s right that only experience may be the best teacher in the end.

  70. Hi Preeti,

    I really get the emotion behind that story. Sad to say I might have fallen in love with such a soul, though I thought for the two years I was with him that somehow change would come, it didnt and now even months after the break up, the love hasnt gone away and all is left is a void though people wonder WHY since that soul didnt really give back anything to fall in love with. The mystery of life, the need to believe in the good. And you know something, people that do fall in love with such people really never give up, they still believe tht soul will someday be someone without a sad, lost soul.
    -the other shru

  71. Hi Di,
    Just the perfect poem for a teenager!!
    I can very well relate to it!!
    isint it true that inspite of all these warnings,we see so many young ladies falling for some one which may sound un-realistic to us;but will they listen??
    I hope the 16 year old will in this case…
    great poem!!
    have to get all my teenager friends/cousins read it!! 🙂

  72. Hmm..i think i disagree…PS

    firstly..is it rite to generalize that all “sad souls” may not be good?..given this advice..the li’l gurl will tend to be weary abt all of ’em…n thats not completely fair rite?

    next..Hmm..im not sure if at 16-yrs old..a gurl is ready to listen to this. It could probably make some sense when the gurl is a li’l older…rite?
    this thing abt lov..one has gotta learn it the hard way, therz no easy-way out!

  73. Nice one.
    I could be one of those.

  74. Hmm actually makes me feel at a loss for some reason. Like I am missing something, yeah yeah even if its a sad soul she had somebody 😀 I bet every single person would see it that way!
    Mm I liked the poem but for one line – “Let them find someone else to eat” – thats not that nice to say is it?

  75. Beautiful Preeti. Wonderful.

  76. Sweet … with a lot of meaning to it…

  77. Preeti this one is just fabulous….
    So much meaningful and somehow I can correlate with it too well….
    Very very well written.

  78. But — how sad that the Grandmother is still yearning —

  79. Sue: You got exactly what i was trying to convey.I think women are particularly suspectible as they always want to ‘change the guy’–don’t you think?
    yes–the girl will surely not listen to her grand mom.Or may be she will–who knows!

  80. Wow. I loved that. I know exactly what you mean. And it’s so easy to fall in love with those lonely lost sad souls, and think you can fix things. It’s why people love some of those vampire novels and I guess James Dean. It’s like a yearning for something beautiful to grow where nothing has grown before.

    I bet that little girl doesn’t listen to her Grandmother’s good advice. No one ever does.

  81. Praveen: I guess what granny meant was not to fall in love with sad souls–as some of them dont want to be happy, no matter what you do.Its a lost cause.

  82. “So stay away from the sad souls”..
    But if we all decide to do that, who will be there to bring them back to normalcy?

Comments are closed.